Stand on ceremony

In a multi-cultural society not every invite is going to be a traditional church wedding...

Today we live in a multicultural society, a fact which should be celebrated – and where better than at a wedding. You can no longer assume that an invitation means a church ceremony, white dress and confetti.

Civil ceremonies aside, including those couples who choose to get married in space, in the London Eye or at the football, there's a whole spectrum of different cultural and religious wedding rituals. Should you be invited to one of these, here's a brief guide of what to expect.

A JEWISH WEDDING

is usually held on a Sunday, but Tuesday is also considered an auspicious day to marry. The ceremony takes place in a Chuppa, which is open on all sides. Everyone is welcome under the Chuppa – which is symbolism that all are welcome in the future home of the brideand bridegroom.

The bride walks in a circle around her future husband seven times. The Rabbi then says two blessings of betrothal under the Chuppa. The couple then both drink from the cup of life.

The man presents his future wife with a ring, placed on her right index finger in an act called Kinyan. Sheva Brachot then takes place. These are seven blessings, at the end of which the couple again drink from the same cup/glass of wine.

The glass is then broken in a display familiar to most filmgoers. Then the couple sign the civil marriage documents before spending the first few minutes of married life alone together in Yichud (seclusion). Traditionally this would also involve consummation of the marriage, but these days it is more an opportunity for the couple to gather their thoughts before joining the wedding party.

A GREEK ORTHODOX WEDDING

is similar in many ways to a traditional Church of England wedding. The ceremony is performed by a Greek Orthodox priest and lasts between 40 and 60 minutes. There is no music other than hymns, and readings are all taken from religious texts.

Generally all church guests will have been baptised into the faith themselves. The ceremony consists of two parts – the service of Betrothal and the ceremony of the Sacrament of Marriage.

Firstly the couple is each handed a white candle to symbolise their willingness to accept Christ into their lives. They have a religious sponsor(s), called Koumbaro (male) or Koumbara (female), who play a major part in the ceremony.

Rings are exchanged and placed on the third fingers of the right hands of the bride and bridegroom. The Koumbara or Koumbaro then exchanges the rings three times on the couple's fingers. The couple is then crowned with the stefana (two flowered crowns attached by white ribbon). The ribbon indicates the unity of the couple.

The Koumbaro or Koumbara also inter change the crowns on the couple's heads. Wine is then drunk from the common cup. The priest will then lead the bride and bridegroom around a table on the altar three times.

The Koumbaro or Koumbara walks behind, holding the stefana in place. After the ceremonial walk, the priest blesses the couple and removes the crowns.

A MUSLIM WEDDING

consists of two parts, the nikah and the waleema. The former is the legally binding part where a party of men, including the bridegroom, an Imam (holy man) and three representatives of the bride meet at a local mosque. Some communities may allow the bride to be present.

The man's dowry (agreed at the engagement) is paid to the bride's family. The waleema is usually held in a hall. The bride is dressed in an ornately decorated lengha (skirt) and red blouse. Her husband is dressed in a white suit and turban. The families exchange gifts and the Imam gives an address.

A feast – usually rice and curry – follows. On occasions during the meal, the bridegroom is made to haggle with the bride's sister for a glass of milk and his shoes, which are stolen from him earlier in the day. The ceremony ends with a copy of the Quran held over the couple's heads and rice scattered at their feet.

A HINDU WEDDING

features many rituals at the ceremony, aside from those before and after the day of the wedding itself. Rings are exchanged before hand, worn on the fourth finger, left hand for the bride, right for her future husband. The day before the wedding the bride is decorated with mehndi (henna tattoos) by her female relatives and close friends.

Prior to the ceremony both bride and bridegroom are anointed with turmeric at their homes. The ceremony is held in a mandap – a brightly decorated wooden canopy erected on four pillars.

The bridegroom makes his way there with an entourage in a procession of music and fireworks called the bharaat. The bride's family are already there and the mother greets her future son-in-law by placing a tikka (red dot) on his forehead.

She also puts a samput (container) of curd, honey, ghee and cottonseeds on the ground, which he must step into before entering the mandap. Inside, the bride's father will wash his son-in-law's right foot. A mantra is chanted before the bride arrives, carried or led by a maternal uncle.

A partition obscures the bride from her bridegroom while information is given on the bride. The bridegroom accepts her and the partition is removed and the couple garland each other. The bride's parents wash the couple's feet with milk and water before adding their own garlands.

Mantras are chanted while the bride's right hand is put into her husband's right hand. Called hastamelap, this ceremony is performed by the bride's family. A ceremonial fire or agni is then lit before the bride's stone ceremony, where she places her right foot on a slab of stone as a show of her strength.

Ghee, flowers and husked rice are thrown into the agni before the couple encircle the fire seven times and repeat seven oaths. Several other ceremonies have variations along the Hindu theme including Gujarati, Punjabi, Jain and Begali.